When working, especially working on yourself or for your own company, it’s quite common to actually feel guilty during resting times. Let’s see in today’s article how to take a break without feeling guilty.
If you are reading this blog since quite some time, you are probably quite keen on that sort of guilt and see what I mean. But for newcomers, imagine yourself having a full list of things to do and anyway taking some rest after working all day long. Did you never felt guilty for doing that? Are you sure? I can bet you see now what I mean !
First, feeling this sort of guilt is normal. Your mind is trying to adapt from a task focused approach, where doing things equals getting somewhere, to a rest focused approach, where you’ll get there by actually doing nothing! This is especially true if you have a lot of side hustles in your life, as your mind will try to always keep an ever-growing list of things to do in a corner of your mind.
This lead to fatigue and a depressing situation in our everyday life. Just like our phones or computers, our mind and body have some sort of battery life as well. When working, even working on things you are passionate about, this battery get drained. Periodically, you’ll need to rest and relax to fill it up again.
For example, let’s say you have pulled all-nighter shifts through the whole 2020-2021 pandemic. 2022 may be a good time to find a healthier pace for your daily life. Maybe you could plan a small trip to the beach each morning to take a break and relax.
That’s when it’ll hit you the hardest: the fear of being complacent. You suddenly feel the guilt of not doing anything for your life or your work, not doing anything for your goals. You suddenly feel like all this time is wasted for nothing !
But you shouldn’t let that feeling go a long way, as it’s a loose lose situation: you effectively didn’t achieve anything, but you didn’t rest either. Your battery hasn’t filled up at all, and now you’ll feel both exhausted and depressed, but also guilty of spending all this time for nothing. Don’t blame yourself either for feeling guilty. It’s not actually your fault. Our world nowadays is 100% oriented toward productivity, hard numbers for growth and performance. That’s a thing with our generation ! If you arn’t careful, even hobbies will tend to be seen from the productivity and performance mindset.
So, I’ll write this both as a reminder for your reading this, but also for myself: You are not the problem, and the solution is simple !
Remember what you are working for.
Zoom out, check if you are where you want to be, and treat yourself fairly.
Take a break and make sure to actually enjoy it.
Don’t abuse yourself, as work can set you free, but can also enslave you.
Time used for yourself is time well spent.
And finally if I can leave you with just one last sentence that will stay on your mind: sometimes, it’s okay to just do nothing.
Social distancing and self-isolation are the new normal. In this environment, it is even more important to maintain a positive mindset. When you get into the habit of starting every day as a Positive Sayings Day, you will improve not just your emotional balance, but your physical and mental health as well.
These are probably the toughest mental times we will experience in our lives. Mammoth upheaval in such a short time. It is easy to feel fearful and let negativity take you over, but never has it been more important not to let it beat you down. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy – when you feel negative about everything, you find that just about everything gets more difficult, and you are more likely to get the worst of it.
A Positive Sayings Day is a way to avoid thinking in a negative light. It is designed to reinforce a more positive attitude to let you keep enjoying the little things in life. Don’t focus on the negative. It is up to you to rise above it.
The power of positive
thinking may seem a bit cliché, but it really does wonders for your self-esteem,
overall mood and reduces the risk of COVID-19 or other chronic diseases.
10 Steps Towards a Positive Sayings Day
Here are 10 ways to make today a Positive Sayings Day, and help you keep your chin up and make the most of it.
1. Start your day with positive
Begin by reflecting on the good things in your
life, and by thinking about the good things that can happen during the day.
Don’t get stuck in a trough by focusing on all
the things that can go wrong. Thinking positive leads to positive actions and
Set yourself some tasks for the day and achieve them. It’s mighty sweet to go to bed at night with a feeling of accomplishment. It allows you to reflect on these successes first thing the next morning, triggering a positive chain of events.
2. Recognise your weaknesses – and
work towards improving on them
No one is perfect, so don’t worry about things
you could do better. Put things into perspective.
You’re going to make mistakes, but instead of seeing this as failure, see it as a learning experience. Break down what went wrong so you can learn from it, and use it to your advantage.
3. Surround yourself with positive
friends and keep them close
Surrounding yourself with people who are
grounded and upbeat helps you maintain a positive outlook. Positivity, as is
negativity, is contagious. So, choose your friends wisely.
We may not be able to socialize as easily – no
more BBQ’s or dinner parties etc., but social media is a great way to stay in
touch. Don’t let physical distance define your group.
4. Be thankful
There are many people in the world in a much worse situation than you. This is world wide pandemic, so many are sharing the pain of isolation and social distancing.
Start your day by being thankful for all that
Each night before going to bed, write down 3
things you’re grateful for. It may be as small as a great cup of coffee or
something bigger as finishing a project or getting your work done on time.
Make it a habit and you’ll soon realize it’s
become part of your daily routine.
5. Seek humor
Nothing lifts the spirits like laughter – it signals the brain to release ‘feel good’ hormones. This reduces stress levels and allows you to see the silver lining, even in the most difficult of situations. It’s hard not to feel positive when you’re enjoying a good belly laugh.
Share humor with your friends; watch stand-up
comedy or funny movies. Don’t let the hard times beat you.
6. Work on tomorrow’s reality
Put time aside every day to work towards the future you want. It won’t come to you unless you let it.
This might be learning new skills, building your work experience or gaining new knowledge. It might be in developing better personality traits or ridding yourself of vices.
Maybe it’s your body – more exercise, a better
diet to generate more energy and focus. Maybe it’s your physical environment, a
new apartment or redecoration.
The list is endless, only you know what will
have the biggest and best impact on moving you closer to your goals.
7. Live the life you want – find something you love to do and do it
Inner strength comes from the confidence and
satisfaction that comes from knowing that you who you want to be. You don’t
have to try to fool anyone, or pretend to be what you are not.
Our world is competitive, and the best way to succeed
in a competition is to make the rules yourself. Don’t waste time and energy
following other people’s ideas.
Taking the time to engage in something you’re
good at and actually enjoy fills you with a sense of joy and fulfillment.
8. Adopt a rich man’s attitude
Success breeds success. Rich people seem to just expect that things will work out in their favor. Sometimes it’s no more than this attitude that opens doors. Give yourself the opportunity by adopting a similar perspective.
Live in the future, believe in yourself and your goals, and leverage your skills and capabilities to grow your wealth, self-respect and happiness.
Rich people let positive thought rule their days.
9. Don’t let negativity get on top of you – beat it back
Often it’s easier to just morph into a negative
mindset. Believe it or not, these are learned behaviors. It takes practice to
stay positive. Repetition. As Arnold Schwarzenegger would say “its all about
When you find yourself in a negative frame of
mind, (and we all do) you have to pull yourself pout. There are many ways of
doing this, each dependent on you and the situation.
One way that has worked for me is to think in terms of risk management – what is the worst possible thing that could happen? Will we all die? End up in the poorhouse? Unless the situation is really extreme, you will be able to rationalize your fears and negativity by refocusing in some better outcomes.
10. Stay healthy
We tend to exercise less than we should and eat unhealthy foods. These are ingrained habits that can be hard to shift.
Here are some tips to help you get on top of it:
Try eating one healthy meal a day
Drink a glass of water before each meal – you will feel fuller before eating, and you won’t eat as much
Be active during lunch – even just a brisk walk will help burn off the calories you just ate and will aid in the digestive process.
Try a Meal Replacement Bar like a healthy protein bar as a snack instead of junk foods.
Exercise regularly – a half hour a day of physical activity like walking or running will do the trick when you can’t get to the gym.
Practice makes perfect
Reinforcing positive living requires practice. That’s why we think in terms of a Positive Sayings Day. The more you do it, the better you’ll be at it. Then, one day when you’re in the midst of a crisis, you’ll find that the first thing that comes to your mind is not what can go wrong, but how can you use my strengths to overcome this adversity.
No one said life was easy and sometimes we get overwhelmed with what life throws our way. But it’s up to you as to how you’ll come out the other end. You can decide whether you’ll have a positive perspective and make sweet, delicious lemonade, or you’ll be negative and be left with a batch of sour lemons.
The people who emerge as winners from this insane period of world history will be those who take advantage of this slowing down of our daily lives to refocus themselves. One source for guidance on this is Tony Robbins – a well-known and respected leader in the field of self-development. He has many courses, books and materials that can help you do just this. Some of them can be accessed through the link below.
Motivation comes from within. In most instances, the best source of internal motivation is to be focused on your purpose, and on what you stand to lose. Following this, the best way to manage your motivation is to make sure you have small daily victories, keep at it and be mentally attuned to the bigger picture.
This post gives a simple 5 step process to keep you on track with motivation and to help you achieve your goals.
drift off-course from time to time, and simple reminders about what we want and
how we are progressing are powerful aids.
Purpose underpins everything. Everything is done for a
reason. If you want to get somewhere you
firstly need to know where it is you want to go. Obvious really, but something
that is often easy to forget.
Your purpose is the driving force of your motivation. It is your bedrock.
As the Chesire Cat said to Alice – “if you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.”
Another insight comes from Yogi Berra of the New York Yankees – “You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.”
It’s also true that if you spend all your time thinking and planning, you will achieve very little. Action is the key ingredient, and a poor plan vigorously executed will generally beat a great plan that never gets any momentum.
action is merely a dream. Action without vision just passes the time. Vision
with action can change the world.” Joel Arthur Barker
The motivation to act springs from the groundspring of your purpose. Today’s actions all lead you towards your purpose. Purpose is the best source of internal motivation, so it needs to be framed properly.
Think big! Make your purpose inspiring and something to aim
for. Small goals lead to small achievements.
Purpose is more than just an objective – it should define you as a person and reflect who are really are. Your purpose stems from your character and values. Achieving your purpose defines your destiny and creates your legacy.
Focusing on purpose clarifies the mundane, it makes you realise the routine is needed and excites a sense of urgency. You never feel like you’re wasting your time if you’re laser focused on your purpose. Everything is being done for a reason.
Visualize Your Purpose
To help focus on your purpose, visualize success and attainment. Play a mental movie in your head and imagine what it will feel like, what it will mean to you. Don’t just feel the emotions, imagine them in full colour and 3D glory, and renew your dedication to achieving your ultimate goal.
Step #2: Focus on What You
Stand to Lose
motivation also comes from a fear of failure. Yin and Yang, good and bad,
winning and losing – they are all motivators.
When you focus on what you stand to lose, and what that might mean to you, these emotions can be harnessed to motivate you to action.
This can be
a focus on the possible losses. These might be financial, but they may also be
career based or social, such as loss of reputation, loss of face, social
standing, respect and the like.
Think about the disappointment that comes with failure, or the hassle and complications of having to start over. Consider how pointless it is to wander around aimlessly without direction or purpose. There are many people who experience failure and the regret of not having tried hard enough.
afraid to slap yourself around a bit, confront your fears and reluctance to
“give it a go”. Be prepared to take the
harder road, and not settle for the quick and easy.
Step #3: Stay Motivated by Daily Mini-Victories
saying that nothing succeeds like success is very true. When you taste
achievement, your confidence builds and you are more motivated to keep going,
opportunities for achievement and making progress towards your purpose and your
goals every single day. Many of these are small steps, but they all count. They
may only seem like small tasks, but if they are relevant to your purpose, you
move closer to it.
as a source of motivation. Celebrate these small successes, get pumped up and
push yourself to do more. Go to bed at night feeling satisfied that you have
made progress – that your goal is getting closer. You will wake up ready to tackle the world and build on these
objective here is to achieve a streak and to build momentum. This will in turn
lead to bigger accomplishments and scale towards more complicated tasks.
scheduling your time by difficulty. Its good to start the day by getting a few
small and easier tasks out of the way. This not only stops these clogging up
your day and distracting you when you are tackling the bigger tasks, it also
gives you that sense of momentum.
all your day doing the smaller stuff though.
these early steps – feel good about yourself and your capabilities, then get
enthusiastic about tackling the bigger, more complicated stuff.
break the bigger ones into smaller chunks, this gets even easier, as you can
map your progress.
for a 1% improvement every day – it’s amazing how quickly these small steps can
build a skyscraper.
Managing Your Internal Motivation
Step #4: Get Some Help
Life is not a single person journey. We all need a little help from our friends and colleagues. Others are often an important source of internal motivation – either from a direct request for help, or as role models and inspiration.
this is a direct request for help – e.g. “I’m feeling a little down today, can
you help me with this or that task?”
Or it might
be a help to build your motivation – e.g. “I’m not really on the ball today,
can you give me a kick up the backside to get me going?”
One of the best sources of internal motivation however is to model yourself on others. Compare yourself to the successful people you know. Then consider how are able to push through barriers and problem times. Develop an attitude that says – ‘if they can do it, I can do it too.’
Look at how
these people go about their jobs or tackling their problems. Do they have a
single line of attack, or are they flexible in their approach – for instance, if they can’t go under, do they go through, go over, etc
It is useful to look to others for inspiration – role models and heroes are an important part of our chemistry.
Step #5: Keep Note of Your
State of Mind and Flow
increasing evidence that outperformance occurs when we get into a state of
flow. It brings to mind a heightened awareness gives precise focus on a
time you achieve a state of flow, internalize it so that you can replicate it.
Take notes, savour it, try to remember every detail of your emotional and
mental state. Simplify it into a form you can quickly call into mind.
Test it – if you think
about it your motivation and mental clarity will spike up and keep tweaking until
that set of mental images have this effect on you
Try it – when you feel your motivation lagging, spike it up with your flow form. Then just let it happen, don’t put a brake on it, or edit it by mentally saying “what am I doing?” Let the focus it brings drive you and be your (heightened) motivation.
Success doesn’t show up on your doorstep, hoping isn’t enough, to achieve success in any aspect of your life you will need to put the work in. Really and truly there is no substitute for good old-fashioned hard work. For this, you need a lot of discipline and the right positive mindset. You need to be so driven by your success that you dedicate a big chunk of your daily energy to pursuing your goals whatever they may be. In this post, we look at 12 quotes about working hard
The good thing about hard work is that talent will matter less and less. As will smith says – No Matter How Talented You are, your talent will fail you, if you’re not skilled. Skill is achieved through practice. Work Hard and dedicate yourself to being better every single day. Therefore, you need to stop looking for shortcuts or easier routes because there isn’t any. Here are 12 quotes about working hard that will push you towards success.